Snapshots

Welcome to the December 2012 Carnival of Natural Parenting: Childhood Memories

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month our participants have talked about memories of growing up — their own or the ones they’re helping their children create. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

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Isn’t it strange how we remember our childhoods? It’s like a haze of time with the occasional snapshot of special moments, significant events or traumatic experiences, like photographs in an album. Sometimes our memories can be triggered by a reminder: someone asking you if you remember something or seeing an old toy, photograph or hearing a song.

Whenever I taste vanilla essence I’m reminded of my late grandmother: eating pink vanilla ice lollies in her shop. There’s a picture I love of my little brother doing air guitar aged about 7 on a post at the seaside in Rhyl in Wales that always reminds me of that holiday. Whenever I hear a song by Meatloaf I think of times spent riding in the car with my parents, listening to the music and singing along, with my dad telling me to stop singing so loudly.

But there are bad memories too. That time we came home from picking blackberries and watched two men fighting in the street, beating the crap out of each other to the point where one’s skin was almost hanging off his face. The time my teacher humiliated me in school for writing on a dictionary: making me stand on my chair in front of the class and declare what I’d done and how stupid I was. The time my brother was knocked down by a car and I honestly thought he might be dead. Or all the occasions my dad berated me or put me down for the way I looked, the way I ate, the way I spoke, doing silly things, etc. I remember each and every one like a little scar in my mind. Permanently etched onto my psyche and self-esteem and a part of who I am.

I can’t protect my daughter from all the scary and upsetting things she’ll experience in life. No parent can, and no parent should even attempt to. This is part of life and it makes us who we are. But I will make sure that her childhood is full of happy memories: a life of abundance and fun. But most important of all, I will never make her feel stupid or ugly or greedy. She will never feel humiliated at my hands. She will never have to hide who she is. I will always be my child’s ally and companion. And I’ll strive to create a childhood that she’ll remember fondly when she’s all grown up and trying to remember those snapshots of memories herself.

Me aged about 4

My little brother aged about 6

My brother and me in 1993

My mum and dad

A happy Christmas when I was about 11

Our one and only family holiday abroad when I was 15

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Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

• Childhood Memories of Peace, Support, Joy, and Love — Amber at Heart Wanderings wants to make sure the majority of the memories that her children have as a part of their family are ones that are positive and help support the amazing people that they are now and will become as adults.
• Hand Made Baby Books — Destany at They Are All of Me talks about why baby books are important to her for preserving memories of her childrens first years, and shows how she made one by hand for each child.
• Can your childhood memories help you keep your cool? — Here’s To A Boring Year uses memories of being a child to keep her on the path to peaceful parenting.
• Inter-Generational Memories {Carnival of Natural Parenting} — Meegs at A New Day talks about her own childhood memories, and what she hopes her daughter will remember in the future.
• Snapshots — ANonyMous at Radical Ramblings reflects on the ways our childhood memories appear to us, and hopes her own daughter’s childhood will be one she remembers as being happy and fulfilled.
• What makes the perfect parent? — In a guest post on Natural Parents Network, Mrs Green from Little Green Blog reflects on camp follow and camp no-follow…
• In My Own Handwriting — Laura from Pug in the Kitchen talks about her journals and the hope that they will be able to keep her stories alive even if she isn’t able to.
• Candlelight, fairylight, firelight — Lucy at Dreaming Aloud re-discovers the ingredients for bringing magic to life, especially at Christmas.
• Making Memories (or) How We Celebrate Christmas — Rosemary at Rosmarinus Officinalis talks about creating new memories at Christmas, and the joy their adventures bring to her whole family.
• The Importance of Recording Feelings and Emotions and Not Just the Experience — Jennifer at Hybrid Rasta Mama shares why she puts pen to paper every day to record more than just her experiences as a mother and her daughter’s experiences as a child. Jennifer looks at the importance of capturing feelings and emotions that accompany the experience.
• Dredged up — Kenna at Million Tiny Things has been forced to recount childhood memories at bedtime, due to the failure of her middle-aged imagination. She resists, of course.
• Crafting Memories — Handmade is what makes the holidays special for Christy at Eco Journey In the Burbs, and she wants to create the same connection with her daughters that she remembers with her mother and grandmother.
• My Childhood Memories; beacons of light in the darkness — Stone Age Parent shares the impact of her childhood memories on her life as a parent today, listing some of her many rich childhood memories and how they now act as beacons of light helping her in the complex, often confusing world of child-rearing.
• 10 Ways I Preserve Memories for My Children — From video interviews to time capsules, Dionna at Code Name: Mama wants to make sure her children have many different ways to cherish their childhood memories. Dionna’s carnival post features ten of the ways she preserves memories; check out her Pinterest board for more ideas.
• Memories of my mother — Luschka at Diary of a First Child remembers her mother and the fondest moments of her childhood, especially poignant as she sits by her mother’s sickbed writing.
• Creating Happy Childhood Memories through Family Traditions — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now tells why family traditions are so important to her and her family and shares how she’s worked to create traditions for her children.
• Traditional Christmas Tree — Jaye Anne at Wide Awake, Half Asleep remembers the great times spent with her family driving for the Christmas Tree and the lessons learned.
• Wet Socks and Presents — Kat at MomeeeZen writes about her favorite Christmas childhood memory and why it’s so special. And she hopes one day her kids will also have a feel-good memory of their own to look back on.
• Stuff does not equal memories — Lauren at Hobo Mama learns that letting go does not mean failing to remember.
• A Child’s Loss- Will They Remember Dad? — Erica at ChildOrganics writes about their family’s loss of their husband and father. She trys to find answers to the question: Will they remember their Dad?
• Childhood Memories – Hers and Mine — Jorje of Momma Jorje wished for her daughter the same passions and experiences she loved as a child, but learns the hard way to accept whatever passions strike in her child.
• Holiday Non-Traditions — Erika Gebhardt enjoys her family’s tradition of not having traditions for the holidays.